Turby and John

Karen's Botanicals Calendula Rose Facial Cream (otherwise known as ham city)

Scent- Usually, scent is not the most important aspect of a product for me.  When the product smells like ham, however, scent becomes a big deal. After applying this a few nights ago for the first time, I contemplated washing it off because of the smell. I decided against it, for the sake of this review.

Performance- This stuff is very moisturizing, and (smell aside) it makes a wonderful night cream. When I wake up after wearing it all night, my skin feels super soft.

Ingredients (as listed on the website)- Sunflower, Olive oil infused with Rosebud and Calendula blossom, Calendula extract, Aloe Vera gel, Jojoba oil, Emulsifying vegetable wax, Beeswax, Mixed Tocopherols (non-GMO certified Vitamin E oil), Borage seed oil, Evening Primrose oil*, Borage seed oil, Rosehip seed oil, Blue Chamomile essential oil, selected essential oil blend.

(All of the ingredients except for the mixed tocopherols and the selected essential oil blend are certified organic.)

Product description (given on Carenoline.com, where I purchased it)- “A rich nourishing cream formulated for normal to extremely dry skin types, including sensitive skin. Made with super soothing calendula and blue chamomile oils, enriched with Evening Primrose and Borage Seed oils. Skin loving olive oil and healing aloe vera combine beautifully with rosehip seed oil–a powerful tool in the fight against hyperpigmentation (otherwise known as age spots). Very lightly scented with pure floral essential oils.”

(To be made more accurate, the last sentence should say “Very lightly scented with pure floral essential oils, and very powerfully scented with something that smells like ham.”

Price- $25.50 for a 1.7 oz container (luckily, I  only purchased the sample size for four dollars.)

Rating- I’ll give this product a six. I subtracted three points for the ham business and one for the price.

This morning I decided that I needed some red lipstick.

Why:

• special occasions
• putting it on and immediately wiping it off can sometimes leave a nice/subtle shade that looks somewhat natural
• because I can

Consequently (and perhaps unfortunately), I picked up the reddest and cheapest shade I could find at Walmart this evening.

Rimmel Lipstick (shade: Red Hot)

Either this lipstick totally blows, or I just discovered that I have the kind of lips that do not agree with lipstick. Picture a clown’s mouth. There you go.

Also, the color is nothing to write home about. It is a little too orange when applied for my liking.

The bright side:

It was only four dollars, and the put on and wipe off method still works pretty well.

Since I am about to run out of conditioner and facial cleanser, I ordered some more online today. I also got some eye cream, because even though I love the miracle conditioner mentioned in my previous post…I want something specifically formulated for the sensitive area underneath my eyes.

Karen's Botanicals Rehydrating Olive Oil Cleanser

The best word to describe my skin is combination, but it’s definitely more dry than oily. This stuff is recommended for dry skin, but it’s winter time and I do what I want.

Opas Soap Ojai Lavender Conditioner

I decided to get the lavender instead of the palmarosa (as stated in my big long list post) because the former allegedly stimulates hair growth. We’ll seeee.

Skin's Apricot Mango Eye Cream

This stuff looks delicious, but it probably isn’t.

I also got try me sizes in Karen’s Botanicals Refreshing Lemon Mint Cleaner and Karen’s Botanicals Calendula Rose Facial Cream. I’m pumped! Get ready for some very informative reviews.

side note: My badass history teacher has made it painfully obvious to me that, until now, I have not had a good history teacher.

Henceforth, I will be steering this blog in a single direction. Posts will consist of extensive product reviews, health and beauty advice,  and the occasional herbal remedy. I will be sharing both good and bad experiences with homemade face masks and the like. In the event that I buy a pretty dress, however, I will not hesitate to post about it.

To kick things off, I’ll review a wonderful lotion that I just discovered.

Tate's Natural Miracle Conditioner

I recently got a rash on my chest. Who knows why? I have super sensitive skin sometimes..but within three days of using this stuff (I got a not-so-small free sample from the health food store), the rash had completely disappeared. I’ve been using it as an eye cream as well, and it gives me the appearance of being well-rested even when I’m not. I haven’t used it as a hair conditioner yet, but I have a feeling that results would make me very happy.

Price: An 18 oz pump is around $26.00, and a 5 oz bottle is around $8.00 where I purchased it.

Ingredients: mountain spring water, apples, strawberries, rose, lemons, blueberries, cranberries, raspberries, boysenberries, oranges, cloves, ginger, pineapple, blackberries, celery, cherry bark, oak bark, orchid, marigold, hazel nut, pine needles, coconut, chamomile, jasmine, calendula, parsley, thyme, papaya, eucalyptus, passion flower, cinnamon, geranium, nutmeg. (WOW!)

On a scale of one to ten: nine, and the price is the only reason it’s not ten.

I bought this stuff for my sister for Christmas because she really wanted some, but I didn’t try it for myself until about a week ago. I intend to buy the biggest bottle I can find tomorrow when I go to the health food store where I bought hers.

• There is something downright debilitating about allowing my hair to grow.
• I am not cut out for classroom discussions; I am, however, cut out for classroom nodding.
• The shit town in which I live is slowly suffocating me.
• Yoga before bed puts me right to sleep.
• I am taking a class on Graphic Novels, and it is interesting.

Jack Black All-Over Wash for Face, Hair, & Body

The product pictured above was another Christmas present for Kirby. He says that it’s fairly moisturizing (which is pretty important since he has very dry skin in the winter months) and that he really enjoys the scent.  It does smell great; it’s a very masculine scent. I’m tempted to use it, but I never follow through because I’m not sure if I would enjoy smelling like a man.

I probably would.

This product is paraben-free, sulfate-free, and has certified organic and vegan ingredients…if you’re into that sorta thing.

Luna Bars are vegan too. That's pretty cool.

Luna Bars have been around for a while. I get that. I, however, only discovered them about two weeks ago….and I am just smitten. Each flavor is better than the last, and they’re a much healthier choice than my former sweet treats of choice ( cookies, snickers, cream cheese piled on top of a cinnamon raisin bagel).  And if I needed another reason to like them, which I don’t, they’re full of things that women need to stay healthy that they may not get elsewhere  (like Calcium and Folic Acid). My favorites are berry almond and blueberry bliss.

Cut Out for Fame Boots from Modcloth

Remember those boots from my  Christmas list? They made my toes want to throw up. Thus, I am returning them for store credit. With said credit, I will be purchasing the following:

Pokrifki Dress from Modcloth

Avian Charm Necklace from Modcloth

As a new year’s resolution, I decided to cut dairy out of my diet.Why on earth would I do that? To make a long story short, I am not a baby cow. To make a short story long, milk is completely unnecessary. I can just as easily get calcium from almonds, oatmeal, wholemeal bread, dried figs, parsley, or kale (and the list goes on). Protein can be found in bread, pasta, brown rice, sunflower/sesame/pumpkin seeds, peas, beans lentils, tofu (among other things). Vitamin B12, a vitamin found in milk, can be incorporated into a dairy-free diet with certain cereals, soya milks or other fortified soy products, fortified yeast extracts, or a vegan B12 supplement. Riboflavin is not found in milk alone. You can also get a healthy dose of it by eating mushrooms, almonds, whole grains,  and cruciferous vegetables ( such as collard greens, cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower, and  rutabaga). Phosphorus, another nutrient in milk, is also found in artichokes (one of the tastiest foods ever),  asparagus, broccoli, butternut squash, corn, and lima beans.

My reason for giving up cheese is simple. Not only is it made from milk, an unhealthy part of any diet, but it also makes my bowel movements irregular… and I want no part of anything that interferes with something as natural and important as a bowel movement.

I still eat fish, eggs, and honey. This means that I am not a vegan or even a vegetarian. Regardless, I have no doubt that if done correctly…a vegan diet is an ideal diet.

The spout of a Neti Pot is more than slightly phallic.

Thanks to this little guy, my nostrils and the surrounding area have never felt less blocked. Kirby has terrible allergy problems, and he said that he could breathe better than he had in years after using it the first time. In case you’re unfamiliar with Neti Pots, they are remarkably easy to use. You just tilt your head forward and to one side. You pour the warm water, salt, and baking soda solution in the nostril that is facing the ceiling. The solution will eventually come out of the other nostril, along with a disturbing amount of snot (if you’re me and/or lucky). If your nose is completely stopped up, then wait until it isn’t to try it out.  Read the instructions that come with the product; I may have been negligent. I’m not a doctor. Check out your friendly neighborhood Walgreens, or probably anywhere for that matter.