What a fox! (photo courtesy of nylonmag.com)

Looking at pictures of Kristen Stewart with blonde hair has convinced me that I may also need blonde hair.  It’s one of those things that I’ll probably never do, but it’s fun to pretend. Now would be the perfect time to radically alter my physical appearance, too, since I’m moving and I won’t have to deal with all the surprised/disappointed faces.  I’m currently scouring the internet for ways to safely lighten my hair.  My conclusion: There aren’t many. Surprise, surprise.

I haven’t given up yet, though. I’m gonna talk to all the hairstylists/colorists that I know and see what they say. Any thoughts on the matter?

And for something unrelated:

I’ve been searching for the tastiest dark chocolate around lately.  I’ve only tried two so far, and neither is perfect.  The first was a little too bitter, and the second was too sweet for my liking. Does anyone have a favorite dark chocolate that they would recommend? Here are the two that I’ve already tried:

I made several friends and family members try this chocolate, and I am one of the few who did not hate it. It reminds me of black coffee.

The amount of sugar and milk in this chocolate bar make it hard for me to justify eating it.

I tried this first. I always put tea tree oil on anything and everything that looks suspicious.

When I realized that the rash was likely Poison Ivy, I immediately used this stuff. It's been in my bathroom closet at home for years.

Luckily, I found some of this in a toiletry bag of mine. It's helped a good bit with the itching, but gross is all I have to say about the ingredients.

I made a paste with this and the vinegar pictured below, let it dry on my hands, and then scrubbed the rash with it.

The paste needs a few tablespoons less vinegar than it does baking soda. Otherwise, it'll be too watery.

I poured this all over both of my hands, and the smell was so strong that it actually made me feel a little light-headed.

The tea tree oil and the anti-itch lotion help with the itching.  The soap is obviously preventing spreading, for the most part.  The paste dries the rash out a little, and the alcohol burns a lot. Still, nothing seems to be making it go away. Any suggestions? I hate poison Ivy.

This is ridiculous, right? Clementine is indifferent.

Moving sucks, but I think that it might suck a little less for me than it does for most people.  My possessions are pretty much limited to clothing, accessories, miscellaneous craft items,  and a lot of beauty products.  I realize what kind of person that must make me seem like, but I can’t muster the energy to care.  Our bedroom furniture is Kirby’s.  Our living room furniture is Kirby’s.  Even our dishes belong to Kirby.  I am using Kirby’s computer to type this post.  We did buy our television together, so I guess that’s something…but moving a television is a lot easier than moving a couch.  In the end, I guess it doesn’t matter much.  I’ll obviously be helping Kirby move the heavier things that belong to him, but the entire point of this post has nothing to do with couches or televisions.

The Point:

I have an insane amount of beauty products, and that picture doesn’t even begin to cover it. I use everything in the above picture on a daily basis. I own dozens of other sprays and masks and creams that I use rarely, if at all.  I think that I should cut back before it becomes a problem.  Hell, it probably already has. Why do I have four different body moisturizers that are all half full?  There is no reason for that to happen. Needless to say, I’m gonna work on it.

Any tips or advice from anyone who has ever attempted an at-home waxing would be very much appreciated. I have no idea what kind of kit to even buy.  I’ve read several tales of DIY waxing in preparation. Some are terrifying, and others are encouraging. If you think this is a horrible idea, then I probably need to hear that too. I used to cut my own bangs. I wish someone had reprimanded me sooner:

This was taken in 2006. Old school, y'all!

I plan to stick with this exact kind of coconut oil. It smells great, and it makes my under eye area soft, soft, soft.

Until a few days ago, I was taking off my eye makeup (which is usually the only makeup I wear) with olive oil.  While on our family beach vacation, Danielle suggested that I use coconut oil.  She had done the same and had an entirely positive experience.  She is always steering me in the right direction.  My eye makeup literally melted away. I will never go back to olive oil (unless I run out of coconut oil and am in a pinch).

To be fair, my hair has oily tendencies already. I probably didn’t need this treatment, but my ends were looking pretty damaged so I went for it anyway.  Someone with very porous hair that is more on the dry side (like my sister, Danielle) would probably have a much better experience with this treatment. I guess the point that I am trying to make is that greasy-haired girls should stay away from olive oil.

I used this very kind of olive oil, only it was organic.

1) Alcohol makes you age faster (especially the sugar-filled drinks and beer that I tend to enjoy), and I have always wanted to be a hot middle-aged lady.

2) Hangovers are not fun.

3) I bet cirrhosis of the liver isn’t either.

4) I am just as pleasant  when I am sober, and people who disagree with that do not know me very well at all.

5) Drinking is expensive.

6) Who needs a weakened immune system with the swine flu on the loose?

7) Most importantly, alcoholism runs in my family, and I am not trying to be an alcoholic.

Menus are for reading. They are not for decoration or a large coaster for your sweet tea.

photo credit: skinnydiver

I was bothered when asked to describe the cheese sticks at my place of employment. I felt that the name should’ve been pretty self explanatory. What was even more explanatory was THE DESCRIPTION ON THE MENU. I described them as crusty tubes filled with cheese, which is exactly what they are. The customers promptly left the restaurant.

I don’t find my insignificant role in life and in the lives of others to be dreary or depressing; it’s just a fact.